CRACK Prussia's New Lover PART 2
by ServantOfTheSerpents
Summary: LAST TIME, Prussia and Ms Fish fell deeply in love and had a drunken adventure. BUT, Austria is in love with Prussia! Whatever shall we do! Read to find out! Slightly OOC. I don't support PruAus, this is a crackfic, in case you didn't know. :


DISCLAIMER: APH DOES NOT BELONG TO ME. ALSO, THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A FRIEND, WHO WANTED ME TO UPLOAD IT TO MY ACCOUNT.

Prussia s New Lover; Part 2.

As Prussia holds the phone up to his ear, he is hoping with all hopes that it is Ms Fish. However, a German voice exclaims loudly in his sensitive hearing aid (he is half deaf from the water pressure); HEY BIG BOOOOY! He quickly hangs up, sighing. He puts the phone back to only hear it buzz again.  
I m zorry, I vas momentarily drunk on ze air outside my house. Vat is it now, Austria? I m planning my completely awesome date vith Ms Fish! Prussia swore he could hear his next door neighbour grumble down the line.  
Anyvay, I m having a totally awesome sparkle party tonight, vant to join me? Oh sure, I ll bring my fishy wishy boo-boo along with me! Prussia then spouted alot of sappy nonsense about his wovwey ickle pickle , completely out of his character. Austria took it as a yes, and hung up.  
He sighed. Vhy von t he leave zat dumb fish for me? He proceeded to howl into his pink night gown, staining his favourite bed-time clothes. He only was more upset, and he hurled his iPhone 4S (he s so swag) across the room, only for it to hit Holy Rome in the face. It had literally smashed through 3 walls into his house, as was the force of Austria s firey love for his dearest Prussia. Chibitalia was startled by this, and started crying.

Prussia did not hear all this, as he was walking in the park with his ickle pickle at the time. Ms Fish was somehow talking, and managing to walk on her fins. Prussia did not question it, as love is a strange thing.  
Oh Prussia, you are very strong! Thank you Ms Fish! Seriously Prussia, this leash is choking m- Gaaa Prussia quickly loosened his lover s necklace .  
And you are very beautiful tonight! Ms Fish done a sort of fishy blush?

As Sweden walked by with Lichtenstein for some late night cheese/ammunition shopping, he could not help but stare. Prussia was dragging a dead fish around a park on a leash, and flirting with it?

Hold on dear, I have to um Use the little boys. Wait here. I don t have a choice, you ve tied me to this gate. For your own safety, dearest. Prussia dashed off behind a bush.

Little did he know that a certain neighbour had drunk away the pain of his rejection, and was stalking him dressed as a tellytubby.  
Austria crawled up to Ms Fish on his belly.  
If you won t love me, I ll MAKE you love me! The sassy tellytubby impaled Prussia s dearest upon his horn thing and went home.

Mr Austria, why are you dressed as a telly-tubby? asked a curious Italy. She just never understands.  
I m Dipsy, F. Y.I. Don t you watch the show? No, because you never let me- Hush child, I have much more important things to do with my time, such as torturing a dead fish!

Prussia was at a loss. His one true love had ran away from him.  
Vas the rope too tight? Why does she hate my awesome faaaaaaace? Prussia collapsed onto the floor, bawling his eyes out, before remembering about Austria s party.  
Maybe some alcohol vill cheer me up Myeeeeh.

Later that evening, a mellowed Prussia had arrived at Austria s completely unnecessarily sparkly party. He was greeted by Holy Rome, and his ugly bruise, shaped oddly like an iPhone.  
Vere ze heck is Austria? Holy Rome gestured into the dining hall.  
Suddenly, Prussia s ears began to bleed all over the nice rug, as a particularly French chef announced over a megaphone that Dinner is hready! Ahonhonhon! He sat down at the oddly small table. It reminded him of the date he took Ms Fish on la-  
The completely flawless, awesome Prussian burst into tears, before looking down at his plate. Tension was thick in the air. Prussia's scarlet eyes darted about the room; at Austria, who had reluctantly invited him for dinner; Holy Roman Empire, just forcing his food down his throat as fast as possible; Italy, kicking her legs back and forth, distracted by crows that fluttered and squawked at the windowsill.  
Sinking back in his chair, Prussia stared intensely down at his dinnerplate. His eyes scanned the various strange-looking things on his plate, until, once again, he found himself gazing at the fish. That one fish was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on, and that was saying something, considering he was a nation.  
Prussia cleared his throat loudly as his face became sizzling hot. He could've sworn it would melt off at any moment. This fish... that lovely, glorious, sparkly-eyed fish. Why oh why did that dummkopf Austria have to serve it as dinner? What was he anyway, an Austrian or a cannibal?  
A snide chuckle drew Prussia back to reality. He frowned as Austria smirked an ugly smirk.  
"Look at you, Prussia," laughed the posh man, wiping his mouth with a serviette. "Sitting there all quiet and shy. Why, it's usually you annoying me to the point where I have to make you leave! Is there something on your mind, or are you eyeing that fish on your plate?"  
Fuming, the Prussian leapt to his feet in defence. The chair behind him clattered to the ground.  
"ZIP IT, DUMMKOPF!" he bellowed, storming to the opposite side of the table and slapping Austria.  
A thousand curses hung on Prussia's tongue, but he decided to hold it in; there were kids in the house. Without a second thought, he swept the fish off it's fins and carried it majestically out of the door, kicking it shut for effect.  
"Oh, Prussia!" the fish said. "That was so brave of you! I'm so glad you didn't eat me!"  
Prussia stopped dead in his tracks, finding himself standing by a sparkling, moonlit pond. "Why would I ever leave you, my darling?"  
The fish sighed, looking away. "But what if people hate you for loving me?"  
Prussia's eyebrows raised slightly. "Why would I ever leave you, Miss Fish?" With that he pulled this stranger into a hug. Suddenly, though, he lost his footing and stumbled, stood in slippery mud, and the next bit is quite predictable. Prussia fell face-first into the lake, bringing his new-found love with him.  
"Oh, Prussia! I'm finally home!" exclaimed Miss Fish, planting a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, Prussia, thank you! Here, I'll take you to my parents!"  
Slowly, the German's eyes opened. Water stung them, but he didn't care. He followed the pretty fish as she darted into the depths of the lake.  
"Come, Prussia, come! My home is not far from here! My parents will love you!"  
Feeling his oxygen seeping away, Prussia kept an eye out for the glint of silver scales. As soon as he'd met her parents, he'd bid Mrs Fish farewell and get to the surface ASAP. That was, if he even made it.  
"Mrs Fish!" he tried to shout, but water began to block his windpipe. He stopped swimming, choking and inhaling more water. This was the end.  
Fins on his face and desperate squeals of anguish was the last thing Prussia heard before he passed out.

"Uuuuuurgh..." Prussia found himself among the reeds at the lakeside, still drenched in water and freezing cold. "I was so fucking drunk..."

This continued in a loop 3 times before the fish rotted, Italy ate it and died. Holy Rome died when Austria s iPhone hit him the 2nd time inbetween his eyes. Prussia drowned in a lake, trying to cope with the loss of his one true love. Upon hearing this, Austria commited suicide.

The end.  
I hope you are happy.  
No sequels. Ever.

Spoiler, I m planning a sequel! :3 


End file.
